In the past, the nighttime serenades and feeds at the Advanced Studies Program at St. Paul's School were between male and female dorms, but a slight change has taken place this year. Starting this summer, feeds have become single gender parties, a first since the ASP started accepting girls back in 1961.
For many, the ASP is a fresh start, where people will not be quick to judge and are more accepting than their peers back home. At the beginning of the ASP, there was bonding within each dorm. Ecology student and Wing House resident Suzy Struckmann said, “All I saw on the first day was my own dorm; I had forgotten that boys even went here until our first ASP meeting with everyone at Convocation.” In past years, it was encouraged for dorms of opposite genders to interact.
Amidst all this heteronormativity, the students who identify with being gay, lesbian, or bisexual felt pressured; they were forced to interact with the opposite gender, and made to feel like this was the social norm that was expected of them. Last year was the first year this issue was very openly addressed, especially through the work of the Diversity Alliance. This group on campus meets to discuss “sexuality, sexual orientation, racial diversity, religious diversity,” said Kim Ndombe, an intern for the Mass Media class and one of the leaders of the Diversity Alliance. This concern was brought to the attention of Michael Ricard, ASP Director, as well as the program’s Assistant Directors. While the matter was initially brought up by some members of the ASP community that identified as homosexuals, Mr. Ricard, the Assistant Directors, interns, and rest of the faculty wanted a change to be made to help the students. “It’s our duty to open up and widen the opportunity for growth, both academically and socially,” said Kolby Hume, one of the Assistant Directors.
This opportunity for growth has manifested itself in the change of serenades and feeds. A serenade at the ASP is when one dorm is assigned a night and a dorm of the opposite gender to sing to. The dorm will decide on a song and sometimes make up a dance routine to perform for their appointed dorm. Typically mash-up songs are used, and the lyrics are frequently changed to pertain to the dorm being serenaded. The point of the serenades is to get one dorm to connect with another dorm, as well as for the fun of singing and performing. The initial connection presents another dorm with something that’s entertaining and fun, and the serenade hopefully creates a bond that will hold over the remaining weeks at the ASP, and even beyond.
Feeds, a much more organized social event than the serenades, are mini-parties where one dorm hosts another dorm to eat and socialize. They are a “fun, charming way to bring dorms together,” said Joel Iwaskiewicz, another of the program’s Assistant Directors. Themes are often used when hosting another dorm and Iwaskiewicz remembers a girl dorm hosting his dorm for a toga party back when he was a student here at the ASP.
Since the students make a lot of their own decisions about who they interact with, a change in format for feeds presented a great opportunity to move away from the forced heteronormativity. Students decide what class they take, what sports they play, and who they see in their free time, so with the control that the Assistant Directors have over events, they decided to make the feeds single gender. Doing so eliminates the possibility of “the middle school dance situation,” said Hume, with girls on one side of the room and boys on the other, and allows a chance for students to meet others of their gender. Master classes have all the same gender students living in the dorm with each other, and there’s little other chance to meet other same gender students. “Feeds are our chance to meet more kids at ASP who aren’t in our classes,” said Natalie Wingate, a student in The Quest and Wing House.
As for the talk that some feeds will be same gender, and others mixed, Iwaskiewicz said that the idea is “doable” and there’s “room for it to develop.”
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